Your puffy gortex jacket won’t stop you from catching that cold if a hobo sneezes into your eye is all I’m saying.

The thing is, when you breathe cold air the blood vessels underneath your mucus membranes dilate, providing heat and humidity before the air reaches your lungs (your lungs’ kung-fu is weak). Increased blood flow results in increased mucus production, and within a few seconds of being outside you start to sniffle. Similarly when you catch a cold your body increases mucus production to prevent further infection (it seems your body wants to protect your lungs, once again*) and you sniffle.

And when you come home sick on a cold day, well, your momma told you so.

It’s not surprising though, seeing that being a mother increases your susceptibility to confirmation bias by 67%  (Based on an independent non-peer-reviewed study, by me. With a sample size of ‘that sounds about right’).
Your mom doesn’t care about cold incubation periods ranging up to 48 hours, or that you might have been exceedingly warm when you helped that trucker with some light dental work. She’s a pattern seeking animal and needs to have an explanation NOW. She sees a symptom, she sees a weather pattern, she puts two and two together. This is the exact same reason why she swears the weather is causing her arthritis to act up. But it’s not.

Well, now that you’ve gone and caught Loose Linda’s cold, the only thing you can do is ride it out. But it’s not all bad news. Once you get over a cold, you’re immune to that virus forever. Of course there are a couple hundred varieties out there and they keep mutating but that shouldn’t stop you from trying to catch ‘em all! Go on! You GOTTA catch ‘em all! Become Super immune!

*You might think your lungs are coming off as mighty wimpy right about now, but evolution has favored the protective mucus measures to help. Sure it might have been nice if you were adapted to lower temperatures or more resistant to infection rather than having that runny nose during foreplay. But hey, evolution doesn’t care about your social grace. So blow your nose, drink a juice box, and tell her to bite a pillow, ‘cuz you can’t prevent a cold by being frigid!